Heavy Metal Rules - Steel Panther

Couldn’t make no money as a singer

Didn’t seem to get too far

So I sell pot brownies and Vicodin

From the back seat of my car

Movin' back to Chicago

Gonna rest my achin' head

Spotify took my last 2 cents

And the butter for my bread

Gene Simmons said it

Rock and roll is dead

Rock and roll is dead

I never did it for the money

I only did it to get laid

But I can’t buy shots for the ladies

If there’s no way to get paid

Now I can’t make money on my good looks

Can’t make it on applause

So I sell nose beers to the kiddos

And thumb my own nose at the laws

But I’m never ever gonna stop playing

Even though rock and roll ain’t paying

Cuz heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules

Heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules

Heavy metal rules

And everybody else can suck my dick

Gonna make my money stealing hub caps

And selling black tar on the streets

Taking handbags from old ladies

While they respond to Trumpy’s Tweets

Apple came to town a ringing

A death knell for the band

If I can’t make money selling records

I’m gonna make it any way I can

And I’m gonna keep on rocking your ass

As long as I’m on the right side of the grass

Cuz heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules (Madonna — she’s a dick!)

Heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules (That punk shit belongs on Mars!)

Heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules (Dokken, Van Halen, they all fucking rule!)

Heavy metal rules

And everybody else can suck my fucking dick