Just Like Tiger Woods - Steel Panther

If you don’t golf that’s okay

You can be a tiger anyway

Laugh through your teeth when things gets tough

Or your balls are gonna wind up in the rough, yeah yeah

If you wanna be like Tiger Woods

Fertilize the ladies in the neighbourhood

Get real rich and you will find

All the hot chicks will want to grind

If you wanna be like Tiger Woods

Grip that shaft like you know you should

Get a platinum card, it will be all good

The girls will want you just like Tiger Woods

Remember this when you’re having fun

Three holes are better than a hole in one, yeah

If the word gets out don’t be afraid

When a 9 iron’s heading for your Escalade, yeah yeah

If you wanna be like Tiger Woods

Filling all the divots in the neighbourhood

Don’t think about those three foot putts

You cover your tracks when you’re banging them sluts

If you wanna be like Tiger Woods

Text messages are never good

Nail a girl at the driving range

Your life will change, just like Tiger Woods

Have your best friend book all your flights

Tell your wife that you’re golfing nights

Get a call girl and maybe just chill

Be willing to part with a hundred mil

Bang a new porn star every day

Tell your sponsors it will be okay

Surprise them all with an invitation

To a viewing of your first double penetration, yeah

If you wanna be like Tiger Woods

Poking all the holes in the neighbourhood

Tell your wife how it’s gonna be

Your driver is community property

If you wanna be like Tiger Woods

Brett Favre did it, so you know you could

Become the king of your neighbourhood

Like Steel Panther and Tiger Woods

Just like Tiger Woods, oh yeah yeah