Me - Social Repose

On one hand I see something I’ve been taught I need

But I’ve learned that the wolf that lives is the one I feed

I have everything I’ve ever wanted

But once I have it I wish I wasn’t chained to it

So my first reaction is to set it on fire

Have I been confused, is there like a balance in my perspective

Can I even move forward without feeling so left out

I never thought I’d be the one to do this

Is there a way to hold the keys but not have to drive

Or not hurt so much and still choose to be alive

'Cause I wanted to be the villain

But now that I’m here I just want to feel anything

I’ve learned that everyone makes mistakes

And now I wanna to make something else

It wasn’t until it felt like I’d fallen on the floor

Or I realized someone could only love me with true unconditional love

No framework, no preconceived mold, no hidden motive

'Cause I’m hard to love and I bring my own fall

But searching for that love is like trying to hold running water

It might be there at the moment but it always slips

Now that everyone’s gone I’ve learned that I helped create that poison

When you let an audience tell you, you can do no wrong

The first human reaction is to emotionally rob them

I let people who don’t care about me fulfill my needs

I let a psycho form and then I push myself to let that psycho repeat

You can’t change what you don’t acknowledge

You can’t change those you don’t understand

And I can’t change all that damage

That I’ve dealt

I wanna look myself in the eyes

Strip away the layer of music and try and say

I don’t care about the bullshit

I just want to share something new, finish each chapter

Even if I don’t stick the landing, I’m not afraid of failure

I’m not afraid of you

And I can tell you that I’m amazing

But I’d rather just tell you the truth

My old habits die hard

They fester and thrive on my insides

And the roller coaster I’ve built has become quite the ride

What was supposed to be contentment has changed with the passage of time

Because even when I write some words about how I need to be less selfish

This is still all about me