Defeatist - Somegirl

I cried in your bed and I bled and I fled

And I wonder why does the sky seem like its bearing down on me

Why does the sky seem so heavy

Why does the sky seem like its bearing down on me?

Was I running away from you?

Or was I running away from me?

Next in line of all you’ve known a defeatist everyone

Repetition of the last or a precursor of the next

Can you find the girl in me through my insecurities?

Can you find me?

Is this how it needs to be self-fulfilling prophecy

Complete my tragic world

As caught as I can be

And the things you didn’t say and what they sang to me

I thought I’d be okay

I fight for control and I hold a victory here

And every day that draws near

I win by less and less

And if I turn around this time

Then I walking away for good

If I could explain to you

Why I do these things I do

Apparent sabotage under the guise of truth

And I am so confused the way I’m feeling about you

I feel this about you

Would you climb down from your tower

I’ve erected just for you

I’ll bang my head against your wall

And clean the blood when I’m through

Then I’m searching for the calm in the hurricane of you

Will you find me again too?

I’ll rest my head against your armor again and again

And if my heart bleeds one more time

Will you let me in

So what secrets will you sing to the black cat in your hand

Her body trembling as she searches for a softer place to land

Will you kiss the spread of moisture as it flows beneath you hand

And remember the sweet longing where our trusting black cat ran

Will you talk to me from sleep can you lie to me from dreams

And I wonder where your heart lies when you’re naked next to me

Feelings ripping through my chest whenever you get up to leave

I want you here with me

Can you look me in the eye when I bell the cat

You say we’ll do the right thing what the hell is that

What am I supposed to do when you’re pissing on the moon

And when I want you even more what can I do