PharmaRusical - RuPaul

Better living through fake science

(Welcome to Ru-co labs)

The future is now and it’s freaking me out

(Welcome to Ru-co labs)

They always say consult your doctor before taking a new medicine but what the

hell do they know

Tell it like it is girl

What we got in stock?

(We got tablets, drops, patches, and shots. We got liquids that can take you

from whatever you got.

Have a sip, have a slurper, if you can still swallow,

a hand full of promises even though they’re hollow)

Here at Ru-co labs we’ve worked so hard to make these drugs help you with your

strife

So check out these pills we’re tuckin

Cause honey they’re here to give you life

(Welcome to Ru-co labs YAHH!)

O M G

What?

what’s wrong?

Boys don’t make passes at queens with flat asses

What can I do about it?

Say goodbye padding and hello to badonkadonk, and it makes yo ass get a lot

humps.

It comes in a patch snuffed down by your snatch.

If it’s a good batch

then it starts to hatch.

Badonkadonk, watch out Jloe, watch out nicki,

watch out Kandy k.

Cause we about to break the internet every other day

Got a new power bottom and it’s on display, it’s got its own zip code by the

way 9−0-2−1-

Ohhhh that’s a big old ass

My backside looks like a mountain pass

Badonkadonks now available on the go, in a perky powder that looks a lot like

snow.

Put it in your salad or a cold ice tea

But don’t snort it up your nose this ain’t 1983

Badonkadonks

Hey sandy haven’t seen you at the club lately

Yeah well, I spent most of my summer working on my drag race audition

That’s not what I heard, I heard you’ve been poppin out at parties

You don’t mean?

SANDY NO!

Used to rule the clubs but now I’m stuck at home, suffering from a case of

restless tuck syndrome.

Cause when I see a stud in a tuck that’s cropped,

I can’t get in my drag cause my tuck gets popped!

But now there’s a solution made by Ru-co inc, a handy little pill that makes

your junk shrink

So easy once a month just open up your say awww, when life gets to hard just

take some flaccida

(Flaccida, flaccida)

Flaccida saved my life and now I love it oodles, even around the pit crew I

feel nothing noodles

(Flaccida)

Now illegal in 48 states

Here’s the tee about that old queen on Twitter, you know that hateful bitch

that’s always so bitter, she says that Gaga stole it all from Madonna

What’s next adopting kids from bodswanna

She wears caftans and moo moos, just like a idol, what she have in her gym bag?

Viagra and midol, kids today are down hill post Mariah, and who’s that new girl

names zendaya?

Do you suffer from bitter old queen syndrome?

Ru-co labs has a spray for dat.

Trollvada spray a spritz a dab under your old under thigh and soon you’ll be

taking snapchats of your avocado toast

For the love of Cathleen turner what is happening?!

HUHH oh my God,

I’m obsessed with Miley’s new single, what’s the new dating app I’m ready to

mingle, I’m gender fluid and not into labels, cutting boards and getting rid of

cable.

I don’t just sit at dinner tables anymore, I flip em.

Thanks conflama

(That bitch is crazy)

I haven’t had a sip of wine in three years, why?

Because now I throw it in

people’s faces!

Thanks conflama

Conflama, it’s conflict plus drama.

You know what that equals right?

Dolla signs.

It’s what every reality Stars got, conflama I put two teaspoons

in my coffee every morning, good to the last death drop

(Conflama, find a way to pull up tonight. Conflama)

Bitch I’m from Chicago

(Conflama, won’t go home till we start a fight, Conflama)

This ain’t rupauls best friends race

(Conflama)

Go back to party city where you belong

Bitch!

The song is over

Don’t you tell me when the song is over!

(Conflama, it’s working!)

What did tinderella say when she got to the ball?

Choking violently

Oh dear tinderella, why are u gaging so?

What could I do, I bit off more than I could chew.

It’s my great defect,

I have terminal gag reflex

Feeling stressed, choked a distant, gag reflex is so persistent,

Ru-co labs has a potion you can drink up any ocean!

Now there’s swalloweve

(Lalalalalalalala)

Swalloweve

Swalloweve is for princesses 21 and older and does not prevent the spread of

stds, side effects include increased bitchyness, an unquenchable thirst,

lower credit scores, and total austigmization

Thanks to swalloweve I’ll be ready whenever my prince comes

(Swalloweve)

Did you see her shoes?

(Yass qwen)

Aren’t they so tacky?

(Yass qwen)

Can you stop saying that?

(Yass qwen)

I don’t think you can?

(Bitch what do you mean?)

Some queens are so annoying, they’re voices are really cloying

Repeating the same words falling out they’re lips like turds

Oh girl you got Drag mouth, it’s a bit problimary, you need to read a book like

right now, and up your vocabulary.

But now there’s a fix when you come and go

south all you gotta do is put this caulk in your mouth

Caulk, as in C-A-U-L-K get your mind out of the gutter

Anyone can use it including straights, bis, and gays.

It stops your loose lips

from shouting drag cliches

Side effects include but are not limited to, YASSS QWEN!

Damn now I got it.

God God Get a Grip Girl, Okurrrrr

There’s a question, burns deep in my soul.

One that you, can only control.

From your lips, to gods ear, there’s an answer we all need to hear.

Tell me is there, an anal option

What’s right for others ain’t right for me, what I’m asking is biology,

Rupaul is there an anal option, for me

(For me, for me, for me, for me, me too)

Five out of four doctors don’t recommend Ru-co labs

So kids just don’t drugs

Just love yoself so you can love somebody else

Can I get an amen?

(Amennnnnn)