The Adventures of Jason and Jr - Pig Destroyer

Jason and I were on

Our way to see Iron Lung when some

Bug-eyed stranger handed us

The Constitution

We thought he was either

Insane or high

'Til a sniper on a rooftop

Killed the poor guy

Before we knew it

We were under attack

By Dick Cheney

In his Halliburton jet pack

We ran for our lives

Straight into the clutches

Of the FBI

But we were rescued

By the actor Michael Ironside

He explained the whole

Cloak and dagger scheme

He called in the Swedish

Lesbian commando team

After the final battle

In the Illuminati secret base

We had cow tongue tacos

From a food truck in Chevy Chase