Real Death - Mount Eerie

Death is real, someone’s there and then they’re not

And it’s not for singing about;

it’s not for making into art

When real death enters the house, all poetry is dumb

When I walk into the room where you were

And look into the emptiness instead

All fails

My knees fail

My brain fails

Words fail

Crusted with tears, catatonic and raw, I go downstairs and outside and you

still get mail

A week after you died, a package with your name on it came

And inside was a gift for our daughter you had ordered in secret,

and collapsed there on the front steps I wailed:

A backpack for when she goes to school a couple years from now

You were thinking ahead to a future you must have known deep down would not

include you, though you clawed at the cliff you were sliding down,

being swallowed into a silence that is bottomless and real

It’s dumb, and I don’t want to learn anything from this

I love you