American Stooge - Mary Chapin Carpenter

He was a small-town southern boy born and bred

A credit to his hardworking mother and dad

A clutch of diplomas and a uniform

Served his country then he shipped back home

Hung out his shingle but it didn’t take

He had real big dreams that he could not shake

Left that town with his hand on his heart

Ready for his oath and his life to start

Ah, he just can’t lose

He’s all over the news

Battin' sweet baby blues

It’s the American way

To hell with the truth

He’s suckin' up to the dude

He’s an American stooge

And maybe he likes it that way

Once he stood at a fork in the road

Scratchin' his head which way to go

Power on his left, conscience on his right

A soul in the balance in a knockdown fight

When he’s not kissin' the ring and levelin' threats

He’s proud to be your favorite hypocrite

Polishin' sound bites for the folks at home

A moth to a flame and a microphone

I just can’t lose

I’m all over the news

Battin' my sweet baby blues

It’s the American way

To hell with the truth

I’m suckin' up to the dude

I’m an American stooge

And baby I like it that way

We all fall down

We all fall down

Ah, I just can’t lose

And to hell with the truth

I’m an American stooge

And I like it that way

I’m starting to ooze

From my head to my shoes

I’m an American stooge

Don’t care if there’s hell to pay

I just can’t lose

I’m all over the news

Battin' my sweet baby blues

It’s the American way

To hell with the truth

I’m suckin' up to the dude

I’m an American stooge

And baby I like it that way

I like it that way

I like it that way

I like it that way

(A very stable genius)