Tomb Raider - Dan Bull

Her name’s Lara Croft and this

Is the way that she started off

She hits land, stranded

In the wreck of the Endurance

She probably should have got better insurance

The challenges ahead are gonna test her performance

So endurance is of the utmost importance

Limited ordnance, she’ll really have to use her wits

Now the developers appear to have reduced her tits

Dragon’s Triangle, here’s a house of lunatics

Darker than the night sky during a lunar eclipse

No clips to put into the gun, you know and

No gun, so it’s a good job she brung her bow

Unarmed, not locked, loaded

Lara Croft going hard with a longbow, depart you with one blow

Prognosis: a disarmament pronto

Shots popping off as if there was a lock-in

In the bar with the Cointreau, top row combo

From the coast of the Arctic to the heart of the Congo

Lara’s banging heads harder than Bongo’s

And angering her enemies, like a mom joke

Tomb Raider, the tune invades your brain

Get in her way and she’ll make you taste the pain

Shh.

This is the bit of the track

In which I kill it with triplet raps

It doesn’t particularly add to the narrative

But it’s a blast

There isn’t a faster Brit on the map

Who’s spitting as wicked as that

So I suggest you give it a clap

Or I’ll give you a slap

An aristocrat whose bars are hotter than ovens

Did I tell you the fact that Lara Croft is my cousin?

I’m dropping a dozen hip-hoppy productions a week

To leave you properly buzzing, and it’s costing you nothing

I’m pretty sure than Nishimura should be hitting the record button

Soon as I walk up and talk upon Tomb Raider

Like a doomsdaying saber-toothed soothsayer

'Til then I’ll see you dudes later

Touché, huh?

Tomb Raider, the tune invades your brain

Get in her way and she’ll make you taste the pain

While Lara’s raiding tombs

I’m sitting on my arse and making tunes