The Aldmeri Dominion - Dan Bull

We are the Khajit, the elite sneak thief

Concealing the secrets that we each keep

With the leanest of feet and the meanest of teeth

We can clean out your keeps in just three minutes each

So that means if you need something stealing

Then really you need to just leave it to me: the Khajit

Look it up, Skooma’s the new drug and cooking it up

We produce it with moon sugar, it’ll soon soothe your troubles

As you just succumb to the tune of the drums and the lutes

As they hum and they hoot and they strum and they shoot

With the stars, under the blue of the moons

As we run on the rooves through ruins and roots

We are ruling the roost robbing rubies and runes

You will rue being rude when you reach our lair

And you’ll kneel at the throne of the prince of Elsweyr

Our opinion’s the dominion is a kingdom that’ll bring Nirn

To ascendance with a vengeance, not dependent on a thing, no

We’re wood elves, what else?

Wood houses are where we delve and we dwell in the dells

Some seldom would doubt if you touch our trees

You’ll be held to account

Down for the count down under the canopy

What now for you?

Well, you’re becoming a canapé

See, we eat each other, we’re cannibalistic

And it’s a compliment if you should call us animalistic

We’re symbiotic with the living things we live with

Resist affliction, Vigor, lead the leaves and lift spirits

These forests will remain forever Bosmer

Real archers in the woods, never mention Kevin Costner

I tote a bow that no-one else could aim as good

So don’t claim you could

Or I’ll make acquainted, feather, brain and wood

Made of Aldmeri blood, the place we hail from, Valenwood

We came and took our native place and greatly raised it up

Yeah, be quiet now, we’re the high elves

We’re tall enough to take things off really high shelves

We do the bidding of the scrolls of praxis

You’ll find us casting magic over holding axes

Exalted and thin with golden tanned skin

Behold the aristocratic and magnaminous grand kin

Descended from the deities so say your prayers please

We’ve agents every place, increase the range Ayren sees

Clearly superior in whatever area we dare to appear in

There ain’t a better Mer here, the more the merrier

So where are your men when you need them?

They see us and flee, fled in terror

You’ll wish you wielded just some of that style

When we use the common tongue to summon that bile

If you come and get vile in the summerset isle

Then I’ma set fire to your bum and get wild