Pitch Invasion - Dan Bull

See me?

I stepped straight off the rugby pitch

Pierced my cauliflower ears

With the ugly stick

Fed up of scrummages

Where funny kids would hug me quick

I thought «I need a new sport»

Then it suddenly clicked

I’d jump ship

As soon as I could find a good port

Head to the States

And get a taste of college football

I’m standin' out

I make a talent scout say

«Hang about!

This is the man

That we’ve been tryin' to hatch a plan without?»

A British rugger lover

Over on shore leave

The kid’s a lucky bugger

My clover’s four-leafed

So don’t ignore me

I’m on the road to glory

Rollin' over rows of foes

Like a coach and horsies

If only I was coachin' your team

Raw meat, I throw the ball deep

Into enemy territory

Takin' on all teams

The very best from each college

I’ll tackle them so hard

They’ll never eat solids

Demolish your defence

Leave them in the deep end

It’s D-Day

The invasion of D-A-N

Check those credentials

Pro potential

My flow’s torrential

So whatever you throw in my direction

Is inconsequential

Techniques are confidential

You wanna step to me?

Please, come on, be sensible

Petty fools

Try to knock me off my pedestal

Like the heavy fall

You’re inevitably headed for

Reignin' forever

So you better head indoors

My whole rhyme’s a goldmine

Fetch the Seven Dwarves

«Good heavens, Lord

What else do you have in store?»

I got it locked

Knock knockin' up on heaven’s door

This is the situation

A British pitch invasion

Bringin' everythin' except the kitchen sink

Sorry, «kitchen basin»

And this is just the initiation

Of the Brit invasion

A bit of vindication

For the fact I never had an invitation

Still reignin' forever

Precipitation

A little bit of titillation