Election Debate Rap Battle - Dan Bull

In a bid to appeal to the younger electorates

The leaders of the three main parties have agreed to a fourth televised debate

In the form of a rap battle

Gentlemen, introduce yourselves

Brown: Gordon Brown, Labour Prime Minister

My style’s like my temper, quite sinister

Cameron: I represent the Tories, my name’s David Cameron

The chap with more flash than a cameraman

Clegg: I’m Nick Clegg, the head of the Lib Dems

My timing on the mic is precise as Big Ben

Brown: Labour’s done amazing things over the past ten years

Cameron: Two wars, a recession, and cash for peers

Like I said, too many twits make a twat

And too many years in power make that

Brown: Vote for Labour

Cameron: No, vote Tory

Brown: Labour

Cameron: Tory

Clegg: Hello!

Don’t ignore me!

While these two are stuck in an argument

I’m the one with real power in a hung Parliament

To vote Lib Dems is to vote for change

Cameron: Uh, no, it’s to throw your vote away

Clegg: We’re not like the other two, we don’t pretend to be

Brown: We know, you haven’t even governed for a century

Clegg: There’s no confidence in the encumbrance and Cameron’s incompetent

Cameron: Well, you’re a (bleep), Nick

The Tory party’s all about family

That’s why I like to drag mine out to stand with me

Brown: Well, I’ll never use my kids as props

That is until my approval rating drops

Clegg: Talking about my private life’s forbidden

Although I have slept with thirty women

Brown: Personally, I don’t like women, they’re bigoted

Clegg: Uh, Gordon, your mic’s still transmitting

Brown: Flipping heck, I offer my sincerest apologies

Cameron: That gaff was a bigger cock-up than your policies

Brown: How can you talk about democracy

With that spoon stuck in your mouth by the aristocracy?

Cameron: I don’t approve of this

Brown: Then get on your bike

Clegg: Can I sit in the car following behind?

Brown: No, you’re a third wheel

Cameron: Unstabilised

Clegg: Whoever wins, I’m being taken for a ride

Brown: Right, there’s only one fair way we can decide

Come on, posh boy, step outside