Congratulations - Dan Bull

Boyinaband!

It’s your big day!

Incredible job!

I know we had our differences

But today, I just want to tell you

Ayy congratulations, it’s a celebration!

Party all day, I know you’ve been waiting

Ayy congratulations, it’s a celebration!

With the chorus at the start to reel people straight in

Dear dear David

Big congratulations

You’re raising the game with these big collaborations

Seriously, David

Big congratulations

For the trail you’re blazing for Midland rap creatives

Especially the ones like you and me with «D.B.»

names and pasty faces

Since DBGames you’ve risen up like pastry in a spaceship

I have been spectating your rise to success

With a strange combination of pride and distress

One the one hand it’s amazing, my mate is elevating

But on the other hand I feel like I’m still waiting

And on the other other hand it’s so frustrating

That I can’t even count the number of hands, it’s embarrassing

I knew that rhyme would sink in well with you

You saw me force it, just like how you foresaw me

Saying a tap is called a faucet

We used to sit and write together sharing lines and jokes

You weren’t like those other rappers trying to share me lines of coke

If we’d met on Grindr I might find you were my kind of bloke

Whoa, no homeloaf, homeslice!

No, tonight, I’m going to dine alone

Tuck into a microwave meal for one, what a rubbish cooking show

I know I suck at choruses, let’s look how low this hook can go

Ayy congratulations, it’s a celebration!

Hey David, what do you think of my Roomie impersonation?

I can’t make a hit track, so I made a miss track

I miss my mate, I wish we could bring our friendship back

Ayy, it’s time for wild celebration, and mild inebriation

By which I mean some English tea and mindful meditation

You and Pewds and Roomie have produced the perfect pop song

Catchy tune, half happy/gloomy, humour, verses not long

Not too complex, not too racist, except maybe in some places

Let’s wait and see what the mainstream media lets you get away with

You made some of my favourite sounds

But I want to just say this now

Although on the global stage you’re Boyinaband

To me you’re David Brown

I know I suck at choruses, let’s see how low this hook can go

Sorry — no, I can’t keep up this flow, it’s far too fucking slow

So let’s ramp it up a teeny tiny tad

Oh yes, I’m kind of enjoying this

But even trying to rap and keep in time to match the rapid speed of light

Boyinaband can reach might be pointless

I’ve only met two lyricists who can really twist language as tight as I can

And that’s my arch nemesis, The Stupendium, and Boyinaband

I’ve only met a few people who equal my level of irony

And that’s you, David, isn’t it?

Hehe!

You and I and me

We had a thing for forced rhyme

A vlog called intercourse time

A gaming channel I neglected, which I think’s a sure sign

I’d never parallel your forceful fortitude or foresight

I’d always be the frickin' Jim Davidson to your Forsyth

You seized every opportunity that I wasn’t prepared to

And capitalised on every potential link it led to

I watched you get on stage and win the crowd while I was scared to

You helped me with my head, I only helped you with your hairdo

But unlike your luscious locks, our bromance has been cut and doesn’t grow

I know I suck at social stuff, like I suck at hooks

But I love you bro!

Ayy congratulations, it’s a celebration!

I’m too scared of repercussions to make fun of Asians

This isn’t a diss track, it’s more of a miss track

I can’t diss you David, I’m afraid of how you’d hit back

We both know how to twist facts into a fucking bitch slap

And somehow still sound so profound even when saying «piss flaps»

We stopped communicating

And I’ve been feeling vacant

Maybe this correlation does equal a causation

We used to be the best friends

Team up on League of Legends

I was Sivir, you were Heimerdinger and together we could reach the heavens

But despite our fancy vocals, we both can be antisocial

We went from speaking daily

To maybe an annual phone call

Dave and Daniel’s bond is like our gaming channel:

Gone

That’s why I made this song

I want to say that I was wrong about you

Guess I got distracted by what your diss track did

I thought I was gonna diss RiceGum with iDubbbz

But I got subtracted

Next think I knew it was you Ian would choose to rap with

But if it had to be anyone apart from me

Well then I’m glad it was you because you smashed it

I bow down with humility

To your YouTube ability

I used to boast that I was bigger than most

But now you’re clearly bigger than me

You said that I didn’t take any risks, just relaxed in making game raps

Well I listened to your criticisms and came to the decision to bring that flame

back

We met in Berlin last year in the summer

It was good to catch up, but it was really a bummer

We agreed we’d see each other soon

But I knew we wouldn’t do it from the feel in my stomach

I messaged you on WhatsApp

Maybe you can talk back

If I’m honest, I don’t care if I come across as a twat

'Cause if I’m honest and I come across as a twat

Well then honestly then I’m obviously a twat

A twat that’s asking awkwardly:

Open up and share your thoughts with me

Don’t make me forcefully break into your place so you talk to me

No, please, don’t call the police!

Of course I don’t mean it, Jesus, it’s just a joke

I know I suck at choruses, but this one’s yours, it’s fucking dope!

Ayy congratulations, it’s a celebration!

Party all day, I know you’ve been waiting

This isn’t a diss track, it’s more of a miss track

I miss my mate, I wish we could just bring that ***** back

Ayy, I bet you thought I swore then

But I just bleeped the word «stuff»

Or did I?

Got the algorithm trying to call my bluff

But I already said «fuck»

So that’s kind of redundant

I don’t really miss you, Dave, I’m just chopping some onions

Crying with AutoTune is weird…