Always December - Citizen Soldier

Snow is falling Its middle July

Just another day here in my mind

Can't escape what's inside

I've been running my whole damn life

Years go by but the colors won't change

Been so long since I've felt anything

Feelings fading so fast

Like I'm watching my own life through glass

No one sees but It's always December in me

No matter where I go It's pouring rain

In my head seasons never change

And It's killing me

No one sees but It's always December in me

Tried so hard to be brave

But the reasons this lifе is worth living

Get hard to remembеr

When It's always December

Black & white only colors I see

Sunless sky somehow stuck on repeat

But i hold it all down

Don't want anyone to feel this but me

I'm only free from it when I'm asleep

The more I think the more i feel myself sink

Back to this empty place

It's a nightmare I could never explain (never explain)

No one sees but It's always December in me

No matter where I go It's pouring rain

In my head seasons never change

And It's killing me

No one sees but It's always December in me

Tried so hard to be brave

But the reasons this life is worth living

Get hard to remember

Can't outrun the cold

When it's in my head

In my head

It's been getting old

Wishing I was dead

I was dead

As this overcast suffocates me

I'm done waiting on some sign of spring

I would rather lay here in my bed

Than have to face what lives here in my head

Hell just being awake

Hurts much more than I could ever explain

No one sees but It's always December in me

No matter where I go It's pouring rain

In my head seasons never change

And It's killing me

No one sees but It's always December in me

Tried so hard to be brave

But the reasons this life is worth living

Get hard to remember

When It's always December.