Mama Told Me - Chino XL

She said she should’ve done this

She should’ve done that

Pack my bags and never look back

Some things that I’ve seen I can’t un-see

I spend my whole life just trying to get free

And I’m never gonna be… without my pain and misery

But I remember what my mama told me (Mama told me)

Mama told me (Mama told me)

I remember what my mama told me

I scramble to my feet to regain consciousness

The floor half full of blood, I’m a pessimist

It makes sense for me to make my exodus

This scene flashing through child monic movie images

I was nine years old with spine hemorrhages

Just me and him was in the house, no witnesses

All I’m thinking is, how I’m a live through this

He unclenched his fist, my face grimaces

I don’t reminisce, I remember the stress

Feeling nervousness when he came home up the steps

Mom he beatin' me bad first escaped my lips

She said that I was a fuck up and I deserved this shit

What could I have possibly done I was only nine

With fucking stitches in my eye she told me stop crying

I’m looking for a sign, the sun don’t ever shine

I’m an only child;

they say that love is blind

She said she should’ve done this

She should’ve done that

Pack my bags and never look back

Some things that I’ve seen I can’t un-see

I spend my whole life just trying to get free

And I’m never gonna be… without my pain and misery

But I remember what my mama told me (Mama told me)

Mama told me (Mama told me)

I remember what my mama told me

Now in retrospect as a father looking back

Having my own flesh of my flesh

There’s no excuse for that

I also have heard that what don’t kill us make us stronger

But the abuse that I took, took away my hunger

Living inside my imagination I learned hate

Planning my escape, losing my personal faith

She blamed it on the drugs;

she blamed it on the times

She blamed on her moms, but I’m the one with scars

Staring at that chipped paint wall in my room

I’m 13 years old now I gotta do something soon

It was the 6th of June inside my mouth was a bloody wound

My step father vowed to put in me in a tomb

Momma told me my real daddy didn’t want me

I figured this new man must be special if she let him hurt me

Now I ain’t had no mother, and he ain’t have no mercy

Why did god curse me?

Maybe I’m meant to suffer

She said she should’ve done this

She should’ve done that

Pack my bags and never look back

Some things that I’ve seen I can’t un-see

I spend my whole life just trying to get free

And I’m never gonna be… without my pain and misery

But I remember what my mama told me (Mama told me)

Mama told me (Mama told me)

I remember what my mama told me

I finally decided that I wouldn’t take it no more

I had a steak knife that I’ve been hiding in my right drawer

He had punch my right jaw just the night before

I stood silently outside his bedroom door

But every breath I took I felt like there was angels with me

Soon his death would be a mystery even to me

I saw a shadow move, he finally coming through

I swung a knife at dude, if I had only knew

The life slipping out a body was my mom dukes

I had no idea that she was in the room too

Wiping tears from my eyes this can’t be true

My step father drunk in the bed still off cheap brew

I knelled down to momma to hear a last truth

She said son I never loved him more than you

I still hate myself, I tried to hang myself

The leather belt broke, that was 20 years ago

Refrain x2

She said she should’ve done this

She should’ve done that

Pack my bags and never look back

Some things that I’ve seen I can’t un-see

I spend my whole life just trying to get free

And I’m never gonna be… without my pain and misery

But I remember what my mama told me (Mama told me)

Mama told me (Mama told me)

I remember what my mama told me