Bells - Anathallo

When I can’t find the word I’m looking for

I reach into the drawer with four tries

But nothing sticks.

Nothing sticks

There’s no telling why I opened it

I try, but I just forget

What there once was, I have not forgotten

What there once was, it won’t leave me alone

The synapses still fire and direct my thoughts

But they seem tired of hunting for homes

And I’m not brave enough to say that I am not afraid

Dhould I return to confused bits of blindness

A tongue wanting words in the sweet speech finds a form

Then returned to the bald toothless need of a child hunched and cradled

(his spine returns the curl to fit the cleft of an arm)

O, we are embarked and return to the place we start

To thrash against it

It’s a wild thing to accept.

Who can hold it?

Think about the loss of anything

Well, someday if you wake to a nameless stranger in me, lead me outside

Let me go

If I’m already there, just let me go